


First Date

by Battythebat



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dragon Age Fusion, Cultural Differences, Cute, F/M, First Date, Fluff, Gen, Intercultural relationship, Modern Setting, dragon age modern au, editor!Cullen, what is flirting though?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-15
Updated: 2016-05-23
Packaged: 2018-05-26 20:58:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6255562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Battythebat/pseuds/Battythebat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Although Cullen was a bit older than Kaeran, he dismissed the idea that he might've had a crush on her. Perhaps fascinated was more adequate. And he certainly was no cradle robber. Yet after a few unsuccessful (and frankly lacklustre) relationships, Cullen meets Kaeran again and doesn't make a complete ass of himself when he asks her out. </p>
<p>This short story chronicles how their first date goes. </p>
<p>Idea came from the tumblr prompt “I never considered you when I was younger but now my standards have significantly lowered”.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Tags are subject to change to better reflect certain chapters.

“I never considered the possibility because of the age gap.” _And I was a young fool, barely a man_. 

Truth be told, he may have considered courting Kaeran many years ago, before he moved out and had big plans. There was always that slight infatuation but he just assumed that she just wasn’t his type because, well...

She side-eyes him as they wait in line to buy tickets for whatever blockbuster nonsense is playing in five of the theatres. Cullen thinks it’s a safe bet anyway, since memory serves that Kaeran wasn’t the girl that enjoyed romcoms or the next iteration of The Notebook. _Maker, that movie was an absolute nightmare._ Cullen suppresses the shiver since Kaeran is still watching him. Instead, he gives her a small smile and debates whether he should try holding her hand. _Keep it together, she agreed to the movie date idea. She doesn’t think you’re—_

Kaeran chuckles and it derails his train of thought. “Oh, so it was the age gap then. I always thought it was because of our distinct cultural differences.”

Cullen blinks. His eyes dart to the exposed pointed ear, the lines of her vallaslin gracing her face and then back to her light blue eyes.

“Oh, _you’re Dalish!_ ” the awestruck tone in his voice makes her grin. The farce is a hit since she blushes slightly, eyes downcast momentarily.

“All these years I fooled you,” Kaeran shakes her head and when she looks back at him, there’s serious edge to them. Not quite accusatory, but perhaps she’s still trying to come to grips with this development. So maybe it’s not just Cullen who’s surprised to be spending his Friday night with a date. When was the last time he went on a date? No doubt much longer than Kaeran, for sure; he never thought he’d bump into her again and find her still single.

He opens his mouth but is interrupted by the employee behind the counter, clearly annoyed that the couple hasn’t decided on which movie they want to see. Before Cullen can recover, Kaeran chimes in; her tone is softer than usual and extra courteous. The sweetness laced in her words sounds foreign to him and he wonders how many years Kaeran spent in customer service in order to perfect that voice. Cullen dumbly opens his wallet only to realize that Kaeran already paid for the tickets and is gently folding her hand over his. The contact startles him and he’s brought back to the present. By the time he comes out of the haze of confusion that are his thoughts, they’re climbing the escalator and heading to the hall to grab seats.

“You know, it’s the person that asks you out that is supposed to buy the tickets, right?” Cullen jokes.

“Then, I guess we’ll have to do this again.”

 - + -

Cullen shifts in his seat, giving Kaeran his full attention. “Isn’t the second date confirmed after the first date? You might not like my laugh which I’ve been told is ‘dorky’ and ‘unbecoming of a grown man’.”

Kaeran laughs out loud and is shocked by the volume and blushes again, clearly embarrassed by such a display. Cullen’s eyes soften and his heart gives a small thud at the sight. Maker, he’s finding her increasingly adorable.

“I’m so sorry…” her words are muffled behind the hand that’s clamped over her mouth. The blushing intensifies. Cullen smirks, relieved that he’s not the only one with the blushing problem.

“So who was the rude date that mentioned your laugh was ‘unbecoming of a grown man’?” she asked.

“Oh, no, it wasn’t a date. That was Dorian, he’s a coworker.” If memory served, it was a silly email from Alistair. After the outburst, Cullen swore off from reading any of his former roommate’s emails while at work.

 

Pause.

 

“Alright,” Cullen lowers his voice, not wanting the people behind them to listen in to their conversation. Kaeran leans forward in her seat, a small smile on her lips. “I have to confess that besides the age gap, I always thought that you had a certain type.” He can feel his own cheeks warming while confiding to her. It takes her a few seconds for her to understand.

“Ah. Cullen--”

“Not that there’s anything _wrong_ with—“

“Cullen,” Her tone is serious and for a moment, Cullen’s afraid that he screwed up. “You know,” she pauses again, rethinking her words as she rakes her hand over her hair to the side and away from the shaved patch. “I did try dating other elves but none of the relationships lasted long, or we didn’t see eye to eye. I also realized that I was worried about what my parents would think if I wasn’t dating an elf.”

 

The tight feeling in Cullen’s chest eases a little and he can tell that Kaeran feels uncomfortable about this revelation. Her eyes quietly begging him to say something.

 

“So what you’re telling me is that after what I assume were hundreds of dates, you’ve lowered your standards in the hopes of finding that special someone.” Kaeran’s reaction is priceless, from scoffing at the ridiculous estimation of dates (seriously, how was she _still_ single?), to blushing and lightly punching him in the shoulder. Cullen feels jubilant. His heart soars when he notices that she’s not quite looking at him but at his mouth while subtly biting on her lower lip. By reflex, Cullen grins and Kaeran has to look away, more flushed than ever.

“I guess I have lowered my standards if I’m dating a handsome man with a dorky laugh,” she murmurs.

As she turns her head to look at him, the lights in the theatre dim and Cullen barks out a laugh, completely caught off-guard. He resists releasing the rest of it, his whole body shaking in silent laughter. The screen illuminates Kaeran’s face and he can see she’s smiling widely back at him.

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

The movie's over and Kaeran has indulged far too much on the bag of Skittles she has snuck in the theatre. In fact, if she doesn’t leave the smothering warmth of the theatre for fresher air, said Skittles might make a reappearance. That would be bad because she's  _on a date with Cullen Stuffy Rutherford_. Wait...Stuffy? That was  _ages ago_. What in the Void was his middle name again? The letters were forming again, swirling in a series of colours that-- _Okay, don't think about Skittles and_ don't  _try to figure out Cullen's middle name_. Not unless she wanted to hurl. In the theatre. Right in front of Cullen. Plus, they're on a date and a sick date is neither fun nor sexy.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Cullen didn't seem to notice Kaeran's unusual silence, maybe he thought she was still processing the movie. It did have quite a bit of explosions and substance to sift through, dissect. 

Naturally, Kaeran went for the least substantial thing from the movie. 

"Did you notice how big Bond's pecs were? I swear he could fill an A cup."

 

_What the fuck was that? Out of anything else from that movie and I go with man-boobs._

 

Cullen laughs. It's not the dorky laugh, but it's close.

"I'm not an expert on cup sizes but I did find them...distracting."

Kaeran whipped her head in his direction. Bad idea, the Skittles are threatening to come back with a vengeance. Ignoring the nausea, Kaeran smirked. 

"I swear, I do have more worthwhile comments about the movie," she professed. 

"Oh, I don't know about that. I mean, those pecs were rather impressive."

"Cullen!" That's it. Kaeran can feel her face warming over again and if she doesn’t get outside soon she might combust on the spot from embarrassment. 

"Alright, alright. Care for a walk? Unless you're hungry for actual food, that is."

Clearly her face wasn't going to cool down any time soon. Of course Cullen noticed her scarfing down the whole bag of Skittles. Ugh, if she saw another bag this very second, she might actually throw up. Instead of giving in, Kaeran took a deep breath and slowly exhaled.  

"The walk might do me some good. You pick the place to eat." 

"Sounds fair to me."

\- + -

Their walk is longer than expected, and Kaeran curses being underdressed as sharp wind cuts through her measly layers, sending her shivering. Despite it they chitchat happily about the movie, comparing it to the previous installments. Cullen casually brings back the comment about the pecs, and as Kaeran is begging him to drop it, Mythal be praised, they arrive.

Kaeran lifts an eyebrow at the title of the café that Cullen suggested they try out.  _The Humble Lion?_

"It's not Orlesian, if that's what you're wondering." Cullen interjects.

"Oh good, for a second I thought you lost your mind," Kaeran jokes.

"Maker, if I did then do me a favour and mercifully end my life."

"I'll need that in writing," she quips.

Kaeran is surprised by how small and minimalist the décor is. The café is trendy, yet lacked the typical hipster trappings that other establishments strived for. It is...well, she hates to say it, but the atmosphere is humbling. 

"How did you find such a hole in the wall?" Kaeran didn't think that Cullen would spend his free time looking for hidden cafés.

As they settle in to an alcove, Kaeran looks at Cullen quizzically. While it doesn’t shield them entirely from other patrons, it provides enough privacy and a view of the foot traffic outside. The seclusion reminds Kaeran of her days spent in the library back home, completely engrossed in whatever took her fancy that day. Cullen had probably noticed her seating preference from the number of times he spotted her.

Sensing that he is under scrutiny, Cullen distracts himself by looking at the menu and clears his throat. _Smooth_. Of course there would be a lump tickling him now. As if on cue, a server appears with two glasses and a jug of water. Giving them a curt nod, he then moves to clear another table. 

"Actually, a client requested we meet here," Cullen says while pouring water for Kaeran and himself.

"A client?"

"A writer."

"Oh?"

"Yes, he has a nasty habit of being elusive and replying to my emails with elaborate prose. Once you get to the bottom of it, there isn't much being said other than 'I'm busy, so relax'." 

Kaeran stifles a laugh and seeing Cullen mockingly glare back, averts her eyes to the menu. 

"So, you're..."

"I'm in publishing. Although this client seems to think I'm his personal agent. He refuses to have anyone else deal with his drafts."

"He trusts you." 

"Yes, infuriatingly so."

"May I ask who it is, or is that information confidential?" 

Cullen really doesn’t want to talk about work, but there isn’t much else going on in his life. It’s terrible how boring he is.

He leans closer, not wanting anyone else to hear.

"Varric Tethras."

 

Kaeran gives him the blankest of looks. 

" _Who?"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I totally copped out in not writing about what food they order...or you know, having them eat something. Kaeran and Cullen are a chatty bunch but I assure you, they eat something. Also, fun fact, The Humble Lion is a small hipster-ish café that actually exists in my area. I couldn't resist including it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be all fluff. I blame [Ballades](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Ballades) for this.

Following their dinner—which Cullen paid while Kaeran excused herself to the washroom, _the clever bastard_ —they relocated to the nearest bookstore. After Cullen revealed the identity of his client and witnessed Kaeran’s confusion, he knew he had to rectify that.

_“You must be joking!”_

_It can’t be. Was she pulling his leg?_

_“I’m sorry, Cullen, I don’t know who that is,” Kaeran looked sideways, perhaps wishing to vanish._

He most certainly wasn’t going to let it go, especially since he thought that Kaeran would enjoy Mr. Tethras’ works. Even if she wasn’t inclined to read some of Varric’s lighter serials, specifically the romantic drivel that he caught his friend Cassandra reading, Cullen knew that Kaeran would enjoy at least a handful of Varric’s more…refined novels.

If Cullen had to be honest, he was tempted to move the date back to his place but felt that was too bold of a move, especially for a first date. No, his intentions were pure in nature; Cullen had far too many copies of Varric’s books sitting around in his flat and if he could find a way to unburden himself by bestowing a handful unto a friend, was it so wrong? While he always kept a copy of each work he edited (with his handwritten notes in the margins) along with the final product, having an entire box full of them was both excessive and completely unnecessary. Cullen really needed to do something about it, maybe donate?

_If Kaeran finds a serial she’s interested in, maybe I can gift her the other installments._ Yes, that seemed like a good idea with the added benefit that it would give him an excuse to see more of her.

“Penny for your thoughts?” She was teasing him of course, getting back at him for her moment of weakness back at the movie theatre. 

No longer staring into space, Cullen focused on Kaeran assessing the row of books above her. Despite the additional inch her Doc Martens boots gave her, she was still short and while not struggling to reach the books from the shelf, the task of reaching prompted Cullen to look for a stool for her to use. His momentary absence went unnoticed and it wasn’t until he returned with one and had to clear his throat to get her attention. Very much lost in the pages of a book she was perusing, she didn’t lift so much as an arched brow.

“My lady,” Cullen called to his date.

“Hmm?”

He chuckled. Whatever she was reading, it looked promising.

“Mind your feet, sweet Kaeran.”

The endearment tore Kaeran’s attention away from the tome. _Her? Sweet?_ She then noticed him lower something at her feet.

“Oh, thank you.” A gentle smile pulled at the corner of her lips, amused by the thoughtful gesture.

She handed Cullen the book in her hand before stepping on the stool to get a better look at her other options. It was always impossible to settle on just one book. Now more than ever, she couldn’t remember the last book she read for the hell of it. Kaeran immediately thought of her parents’ library and how it was filled with mostly Elvhen lore, philosophy and what was available about the gods themselves; while their library was grand, it was lacking in fiction, and scarce in terms of non-Elvhen works. Kaeran’s parents never had issue with her reading outside the scope of their own culture but as she got older, she sensed that they wished she had outgrown her childish whims and placed her interests in all things Elvhen.

A calm dread filled her momentarily until she recalled where she was and with whom. Her parents weren’t hovering over her shoulder with obvious disapproval. She lifted two other books at random, glancing at the covers (not much to gather from other than a fierce looking woman staring back in a challenging manner, while the other had a simple blue background with the title and author’s name emblazoned across with a devastatingly beautiful font). She smiled. Along with the book in Cullen’s hand she was satisfied with her choices. They’ll do, for now.

“Oh, I hope you don’t mind me choosing on my own. I just realized that I’m with an expert of Mr. Tethras’ works, I hope you don’t take it the wrong way for not asking you.”

Cullen smirked.

“Not at all. I’m not sure how I feel about being called an expert, knowing his works comes with the job. Besides, I wasn’t sure what your preferences are.”

“After all this time and you feign ignorance? Cullen, how could you!”

“Alright, alright. Have you finished or are you intent on buying his entire repertoire?”

They made their way to checkout, the whole time they lapsed into silence. Cullen supposed it was a perk since Kaeran wasn’t exactly a stranger to him. Finally, they were next in line. The first available cashier flagged Cullen to move who looked down and noticed that Kaeran was very much absorbed with one of the books already. He smirked at how adorable she looked with her brow slightly pinched in concentration.

“We’re up,” he said while gently nudging her to walk ahead.

Then things became immediately awkward.

Of all the times that he bought books from this place, he never once left with a bad experience. Judging the look or rather glare that the cashier shot at Kaeran, Cullen braced himself to make this transaction go as smoothly as possible. _Hopefully this woman doesn’t have the gall to say something offensive._

As if the glare wasn’t enough, the cashier made a point to avoid eye contact with Kaeran and instead focused on Cullen.

“Good evening, sir, did you find everything that you were looking for?” The employee even had the audacity to give him a once over while addressing him. _What in the Void?_ His thought process was interrupted when Kaeran invaded his space, standing a couple of inches taller (Cullen glanced down and realized that she was standing on her tiptoes) and addressed the cashier.

“I did, actually. _Thank you!_ ” Kaeran responded cheerfully, much to the annoyance of the woman across from her. The thank you was drenched in sarcasm and Cullen noted how the woman clutched the scanner harder as she charged each book. He was equally incensed when the cashier refused to look at Kaeran and again spoke to him.

“And how will you be paying?”

What the cashier didn’t expect was the sound of Kaeran’s hand smacking the counter; the bills were smothered underneath her dominant hand as though it was the currency and not the employee that offended her. For once, the cashier stared at Kaeran and there was a hint of apprehension in her eyes at what she witnessed. Cullen’s date narrowed her eyes before nodding once ever so slightly before muttering, “I’ll pass on the bag, save the environment and all that.”

Cullen was about to intercede by grabbing the books—not that he thought Kaeran couldn’t handle the situation, but he felt utterly useless watching the whole thing unfold.

Shame burns him for not saying anything sooner, not even to condemn the employee’s attitude towards Kaeran. Some upstanding guy _he_ is. Cullen realizes yet again that he’s too slow to act and that Kaeran grabbed his wrist while making her way to the exit. He notices that his date’s steely gaze doesn’t leave the spot where the cashier (still, and perhaps paralyzed with fear) stands, almost as though she was memorizing every little detail should she encounter that same despicable individual again. It isn’t until they reached the door to leave the bookstore that Kaeran eases up on the death glare and looks ahead, pushing the door open for herself and Cullen and making it to the end of the block before stopping. Cullen feels the grip on his wrist loosen as Kaeran realizes that she basically dragged a grown man out of a store with witnesses everywhere. 

Releasing him entirely, Kaeran focuses on her bag, rearranging the books she had shoved without looking; it had been entirely worth it to glare at the bookstore employee. She might regret it in a couple of hours but at the moment, she’s high on the rage she feels pumping throughout her body. Books finally sorted, Kaeran looks up at Cullen and deflates a little. Some date she’s been. Shame starts to trickle in and cools some of the wrath that’s still there, at least she doesn’t see red anymore. Praise Mythal.

An apology is on the tip of her tongue but she clicks her jaw shut when Cullen gently takes her hand in his. He holds it gently, more open than tightly secured, giving her the chance to remove her hand with ease and without judgment. He gives her hand a squeeze, requesting her attention, and when she looks up she sees his eyes are tight, his brows furrowed.

“Kaeran, I’m so sorry, what happened in there,” he falters. How can a sorry fix what just transpired?

Kaeran looks down at their hands, still open, and she can just as easily slip out of his loose grip and walk away.

“Can we,” she clears her throat, “can you take me home?”

Cullen tries to hide his disappointment and silently nods. It’s obvious that Kaeran is being merciful by ending the date this way and giving him the chance to bring her back to her place. At least this way the date doesn’t end on a dramatic note and Cullen can walk away with some dignity intact. Kaeran tries to cheer him up by lightly squeezing his hand, her head tilted to the side and eyeing him. He lets out a small puff of air and gives a small reassuring smile. Whatever happens, he will respect her decision and if she doesn’t want to take this venture further, he’ll lick his wounds, take some time off for himself and begin again.

“Alright, I’ll take you home.”

 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're nearing the end because well, there is inevitably a finality when it comes to first dates. 
> 
> I also have never seen the movie Risky Business so don't judge me.

The whole drive back to her place, Kaeran’s mind raced with ways she could salvage their date. She worried that after the night was done, once Cullen walked her to the door that it would be the end of things, an end to that sweet potential between them. Kaeran didn’t want to let go, but she didn’t want to come across as crazy. It’s not like she thought about what their hypothetical children would look like.

Alright, that happened _once_ and that was when she was harbouring the most embarrassing crush ever…over a shem, _wonderful_.

Her mother would literally die from shock.

Kaeran absently wondered if her mother would react similarly today and if her father would ever forgive her. She rubbed her hand absently, the one that she oh-so smartly smacked on the counter to wipe the cool demeanor off that rude employee’s face. Despite the throbbing pain, it was worth it. Kaeran hadn’t paid much attention to how hard she had hit her hand—her mind too focused on the pent up rage to register the initial jolt of pain—but now that she was fidgeting in the passenger seat and burning with shame (because Cullen was there to witness the whole thing and oh right, _they were on a date_ ) her hand ached fiercely. And was it just her or was the pain pulsating in tandem with her embarrassed flushing?

 _Bet Cullen thinks you’re a savage for reacting the way you did_.

Perfect, here come the “happy” thoughts.

_More importantly, why didn’t he do anything? He could’ve said something._

That was another. Usually they came in threes.

_It was a shit idea anyway, we’ll just be forever alone because we can’t behave pro—_

Kaeran was close to yelling for the nagging thoughts in her head to shut up because honestly, they weren’t helping her nerves and yelling in a car out of the blue was dangerous and then Cullen would think that there’s something absolutely wrong with her. Kaeran was quite talented in making things worse for herself. Don’t worry about the rope, she’ll find a way to blunder and off herself in the process, guaranteed.

She settled to just crumple her fingers tightly, fingernails sinking into her palms.

Kaeran winces because, right, she messed up her hand when she slammed it back at the bookstore. Thinking she made a good recovery and managed to choke back the pitiful howl, Kaeran knows better than to glance sideways towards Cullen. She infinitely prefers his ghostly reflection and opts to stay quiet except for giving necessary directions to her place.

If Cullen heard her, he didn’t comment.

They don’t talk until they’re at the threshold of her apartment. She’s not sure if that was done for her sake but she’s grateful that Cullen is sensitive enough about what happened to not lightly brush it aside. Maybe he doesn’t know how to proceed. As the door to her place opens, she looks over her shoulder, eyebrow quirked up.

He’s currently lost in thought with both hands in the pockets of his jacket.

“You coming in?” he looks up at her, all he’s missing is a giant question mark over his head.

“I’m not sure if-’”

“It’s alright if you don’t feel up to it, I figure it’s still early and we know each other so you coming in isn’t that scandalous.”

Finally, he smiles. It’s small and shy, but it eases her heart. Maybe things aren’t entirely hopeless.

“Alright, I’d like to.”

 

\--//--

 

Kaeran’s apartment is old but well taken care of and although it can be a tight fit for someone like Cullen, it’s still cozy. The high ceilings and moldings along the doorways harken to another time but the general flow and décor is quite modern yet indicative of its present occupant. Kaeran took pains to bring a balance to the place and make it feel like home. No doubt when she moved out her parents insisted that she bring as many Dalish items to her new home as possible. The image of her debating with her parents and begrudgingly giving concessions made him chuckle. 

“Coffee or tea?” she called from the kitchen.

He walked over—it wasn’t far since again, cozy apartment—and he hovered by the entrance.

“Tea.”

She returned a smile as she placed the kettle over the stove. Kaeran opened a cupboard and pulled out a box filled with an assortment of tea.

“Here, you can put this on the coffee table. We’ll sit in the living room, hope you don’t mind. The kitchen chairs aren’t as cozy as the couch.”

 

\--//--

 

While waiting for the kettle to screech, they settled on Kaeran’s couch. Being a big fan of corners, Kaeran settles on one end of the three seater, her back leaning against the armrest and her knees tucked under her chin. Cullen sits in the middle, body turned towards Kaeran with his arm draped over the top of the couch. He lazily runs his fingers over the threaded pattern, unsure what to do with his other hand and deciding to rest it over the knee of his crossed leg. He’s hoping that his body language translates as relaxed. He’s trying to figure out how to address the unfortunate event in the bookstore but Kaeran catches him off-guard with a seemingly innocent question.

“What’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve been caught doing?”

Cullen’s head snaps up to look at her, his heart startled and he momentarily forgot to breathe. What did she mean? And was there a limit to the level of embarrassment? He couldn’t outright refuse her or offer a lame anecdote but then there was the issue of oversharing.

“Sorry, you don’t have to answer that if you don’t feel comfortable,” her voice wavers, worrying that she offended him and looking anywhere but at him.

“What? No! You just…my mind blanked out. Perhaps you can offer me one of yours?”

Kaeran’s brow momentarily frowns and she gives him a doubtful look.

“You promise not to cop out?”

“I promise.”

Seemingly satisfied, she gently rocks herself while mulling over what she could possibly divulge without risking her dignity.

“Okay, so I sometimes do this thing…” she pauses before shaking her head and covering her face. “Just forget what I asked, how about I ask you another question like what’s your favourite colour?”

“No, no. I promised not to cop out, you can’t very well talk yourself out of this.”

Kaeran dramatically deflated, mumbling a damnit under her breath.

“Alright, okay, so I do this thing where…” she visibly blushes and the intensity makes Cullen worry that she might pass out from having all the blood rush to her face. Did he ever blush that way? What a dumb question, of course he’s had. It was still refreshing to witness someone else experience that level of embarrassment.

“So you do this vague thing where?” he prods not quite mercilessly but almost.

“Ugh! Okay! I lipsynch to certain kinds of music when there’s no one around and I like to pretend I’m in a music video while I do it! Satisfied!?”

Cullen stares at her dumbly and the tension in the room is palpable. Then, Cullen’s whole body shakes, starting small at first and he tries to tame it and trying to act serious.

“W-what kind of music?” He’s going to giggle, he just knows it. Kaeran narrows her eyes, daring him to keep laughing. She tosses her hair over one shoulder to conceal her continuing embarrassment.

“Rock n roll, electro pop…”

“Well those aren’t bad,” his lips are curling upwards, knowing that there was more. There had to be.

Kaeran looks to the side, towards the kitchen.

“Honestly, how has that kettle not screamed yet?”

“You’re stalling.”

“What?”

“You. Are. Stalling.”

Kaeran sighs in defeat.

“Okay fine, it’s mostly power ballads that I lipsynch to.”

“So…?” 

“So one night, I thought I had the place to myself and I hadn’t done it in a while. So I really committed to it.”

“Nooo! You didn’t!”

“I did. Hair, makeup…did the best with what I could find in terms of clothing. Turns out my mum never got rid of her party clothes…”

“And?”

“What do you mean ‘and?’ I got caught by my parents!”

“What were you wearing?”

She paused, possibly prayed for the damn kettle to save her from answering. It still didn’t bloody screech. The entire pantheon was mocking her.

“I was wearing one of her larger, flashier collared shirts, no pants and gliding across the hallway with socks on.”

“Aaand??” Oh Creators, she was going to smother him with one of her fancier pillows.

“Yes, for Mythal’s sake, I was wearing shades too! Happy!?”

Not hearing him laugh she turns to look at him only to find that his entire body is convulsing with one hand pressed firmly over his mouth, trying and failing to hold back the growing hysteria.

“You know, he doesn’t wear shades in the movie, right?”

Her scowl was the cherry on the top and Cullen absolutely loses it, throwing his head back and barking out loud with laughter.

“Mythal above! That _is_ an incredibly dorky laugh and unbecoming of a grown ass man.”

At this point, Cullen doesn’t care that Kaeran is in agreement with Dorian’s statement, being far too preoccupied with being doubled over with laughter and holding his sides.

“Oh, Maker,” he straightens himself, wiping the tears from his eyes. “I’m so sorry, I just, I honestly haven’t laughed like that in _ages_. Please don’t be mad at me.”

 

Kaeran does her best to look offended, arms tightly crossed with her head angled away from him. He spies the corner of her mouth twitching in amusement.

He leans forward, gently pulling for one of her hands and smoothing her knuckles with his thumb.

 

“I know you’re not really mad at me.”

“Uh-huh,” she tries to keep the façade going and Cullen takes full advantage of it.

“How can I make this better?” his tone is serious again and Kaeran is reminded of the silent question that passed between them earlier.

She sighs, pretending to think and going so far as to tap the index finger of her free hand against her lips. Cullen finds himself momentarily entranced by that digit.

“Welllll,” she drawls out the word and recaptures Cullen’s full attention. “You could give me a really good embarrassing story.”

Cullen chuckles.

“I suppose it’s only fair.”

“Oh, it definitely is.” She insists.

 

He has to think about it for a minute, the slight eerie silence in the room making him difficult to concentrate and he knows that Kaeran is attentively watching him. He clears his throat. No pressure whatsoever.

 

“I suppose,” he starts, flushing slightly under her scrutiny. “I suppose it’s a bit similar to your embarrassing moment.”

“You also got caught by your parents dancing to Old Time Rock n Roll with no pants on?” 

The image of Kaeran dramatically sliding down the hallway wearing a shirt and socks had him chuckling. He’d bet a whole month’s pay that she still dances like that, even with sunglasses indoors in the middle of the night.

“No, not quite. I was caught by my sister Mia,” Kaeran inhales, her eyes going wide.

“Nooo!! Not what I’m thinking, please! Not that! Your poor sister!”

Cullen turns sideways, looking absolutely affronted.

“Excuse me, can we get our mind out of the gutter for at least five minutes?”

 

Kaeran gives him an apologetic smile and as he continues to stare, unimpressed, she mimics zipping her mouth shut. Somewhat satisfied but still dubious, he resumes his story. 

“As I was saying, my sister caught me talking to myself in the mirror.”

“That’s not so bad, we all do it,” Kaeran gives his hand an encouraging squeeze.

“It’s not the talking to myself part…I mean, it is to some degree, but it was more what I was saying.”

He waits for her to interject but Kaeran decided to remain mute. She gives him the slightest nod of her head, silently reassuring him.

“You might remember how I was very timid as a young boy, keeping to myself and pointedly avoiding girls.”

 

It’s true, besides his sisters, Kaeran has a hard time recalling a young and boyish Cullen spending time with other girls. He was always courteous and stuttered his greetings but he never stuck around longer than was necessary.

 

“When I realized that I didn’t find girls gross anymore and wanted to get to know them better, I just couldn’t. I would immediately freeze and panic. My mum read right through me and suggested that I practice in front of a mirror. At first I thought it was stupid and how embarrassing it was to look at myself but somehow I stuck by it and just kept at it.” 

Kaeran smiled. “Your sheer stubbornness helped you.”

“Perhaps,” he gave her hand a slight squeeze. “Anyway, one of those times, Mia found me out. She felt bad about it, after she stopped laughing, of course.”

“How old were you?” she wondered.

“Ah,” with his free hand, Cullen rubbed the back of his neck. Kaeran spied the tips of his ears turning a faint red.

“Thirteen? Fourteen?” she supplied.

Cullen shook his head and kept staring at his feet.

“Alright, fifteen.”

“Try seventeen.”

 

Kaeran blinked, her mouth slightly open before shutting it.

“Well, look at it this way, at least it paid off. You were always so focused for student debates and presentations.”

“Yes, I was quite good at oral…” Cullen is sidetracked by how she’s leaning in very close to his personal space.

“Good at what?” she feigns innocently, as though she didn’t purposely interrupt him.

There’s a clicking noise at the back of his throat as he tries to finish his sentence. He clears his throat and attempts again.

“I’m good at...oh, you know what I meant to say!” Kaeran chuckles at how petulant he looks.

 

She kisses him on the cheek to placate him, hoping that he’d forgive her for teasing him so much. She doesn’t expect him to go rigid and she internally winces, ready to chastise herself for overstepping again. Kaeran tries to move away from him but one of his arms wraps firmly behind her, keeping her close.

She tries not to think about the delightful scrape his stubble left against her lips and chin. Kaeran instead focuses on his eyes but clearly that’s a mistake since her mind immediately blanks at the sight of his heated look. If those eyes were actual flames, she’d gladly let them consume her.

His grip around her lower back eases as he adjusts his hand between her shoulder blades while his other hand rests at her hip; it’s a careful hold, and one that she could wriggle out of if he’s overstepping. If anything, it’s frustrating how damn considerate he is around her.

Patience, patience, she reminds herself.  

Kaeran decides to the Void with patience and settles herself into his lap, effectively pushing his back into the couch. While steadying herself with one hand on the headrest, just shy of Cullen’s head, Kaeran focuses on his lips, drawn by their perfect shape, even the harsh scarring on one side is pleasing to behold. Not wanting to be construed as wanton she stares into his eyes, trying to get a read of his reaction and if this is too much for a first date between friends who clearly hold stronger feelings for each other. She expects Cullen to look like prey, body tense and begging for mercy. His eyes promised anything except mercy, smirking when he saw the effect he had on her.

She gazes back to his lips, wonders how bad the injury was to have such crude hands leave a lasting mark like that. She can tell where the stitches were made, point to the point of entry the needle made as it made a clumsy attempt in reattaching the rent skin.

In her careful examination, those damned lips move.

 

“You know, I still practice in front of a mirror.” He whispers, as though he was conspiring precious information. It probably was but Kaeran’s brain is seemingly distracted.

“Oh? Really?” why is she whispering now?

“Actually, I haven’t needed to for quite some time. That is, what I’m trying to say is, I haven’t been this nervous to ask someone out for a while.”

“I don’t see how you could be nervous, you’re very attractive. I’m sure even on your lazy days you could make the ladies swoon.”

Cullen laughs at that, his eyes crinkle with mirth. Kaeran has the idiotic thought to kiss the small creases.

 

“That is too kind of you, but I do still have moments of doubt.”

“Good looks and humble, I don’t see how you can be unlucky. You can have anyone you want.”

The amused look on his face falls, his tone suddenly serious.

“Even if it is true, and I honestly doubt that, but if it is…I’d still consider myself the most wretched man in the world if I couldn’t have the one person I most want by my side.”

“Are you professing your undying love to me on a first date?” She leans back, grinning. Cullen scowls in response.

 

The invitation is too strong and Kaeran cradles his face, tilting his head for her convenience before kissing him. She welcomes the pleasant scraping of his stubble against her hand, her face and the beautiful contrast to his soft and pliant lips.

Apparently Kaeran is too far for his liking, so he pulls her closer with an iron grip on her waist. Cullen’s other hand cradles the side of her head, his thumb brushing against the shaved patch. He gets a bit overwhelmed with these new sensations and accidentally brushes her exposed ear. It had been a long, long time since someone else got close to her ears and clearly starved for this kind of attention, she moans, opening her mouth and letting Cullen dominate, crushing and claiming her lips.   

 

Of course, that’s when the damn kettle decides to screech.


End file.
